I don't know about you, but I hate difficulties. I have a natural tendency toward relaxed peace of mind and body. I'm wildly sorry for any extra effort - fighting obstacles, arguments, conflicts, trying to finish or hold on to what's leaking out. Many people, when they get to know me better, say, "How great, it's so easy for you!" or "You're so brave, I couldn't do that!" And I thought: my life has not always been like this. Moreover, even today there are many situations that are not easy in themselves. And yet my personal barometer of feelings from every day of my life says that I have learned to live easily.
This is not the end point of the route, and I am sure that over time I will master new levels of ease. In the meantime, I have searched and collected all the things that helped me once to reach this level of relationship with life. No path is copy-pasted, but perhaps my assembly points will lead you to your own tips.
1. It actually took me the most effort to accept that there MAY not be a struggle. That the laurels of Suvorov, every day storming the Alps, the feat of a Real Man, and other pioneering and self-made slogans do not warm me personally at all. I fight more and more out of habit, for fear of appearing weak, unambitious, and lazy. Proving myself to others, but more and more to myself. Then I allowed myself to sacrifice any of these images if it made me happier. I stopped suffering from achieving, measuring myself by successes, and saw that peace with myself was significantly more precious to me. Later I found in my "weaknesses" and "laziness" an enormous driving force - if I don't fight them as well.
2. Moving toward a lighter and more relaxed life, I learned to let go of anything that didn't add up easily. And I haven't lost anything from it - I've begun to notice just how much stuff happens to LEAVE when I'm relaxed and not holding on to anything.
3. I noticed that I was having a hard time going through life with the weight of the past dragging me down all the time. I kept coming back to words, people, situations, decisions, memories from years ago. It was all over, but not for me-they were absolutely real in my head. I kept trying to rewrite my past life cleanly, to find excuses for myself, to find fault with the events. Honestly, it was terribly exhausting. One day I let go of the past and decided to move on. In every moment of my life, I was the best version of myself. I did the best I could, and I can't change anything about what's gone, and it doesn't even make sense, it was my best past.
4. I have learned to "streamline" any obstacles, listen to the moment and take pause. If the store is closed, I don't have to go. The bus didn't arrive on time - so I have to take the next one or look around and notice what I was delayed for.
5. I have found it very easy to let people go and end relationships as soon as I feel the mutual interest, energy and exchange is gone. The fact that you've been set up with someone doesn't make you companions in life. But those right now are a great gift to me, and I treasure every moment together. That's because I know that someday (maybe very soon) our friendship, partnership will expire and we will fly away in our own orbits. So new people began to come into my life, consonant with the moment - there was a place for them.
6. I freed my life from all the commitments I don't consider important. There is no "should" in my vocabulary. I only do what resonates with my heart and I see the meaning in it.
7. I avoid any decisions that make my life cumbersome, I don't make promises, I don't fit into heavy-handed multi-year processes and inflexible structures. It's very difficult to be responsive to the flow and easy when loans, real estate, insurance, visa or employment contract obligations are in the fairway. If I do get into something, I always ask myself if I'm ready to lose what I'm currently investing if the moment suddenly forces me to move on.
8. I've gotten rid of a ton of stuff - my life is long gone from options like furniture, dishes, appliances, paper books, etc. I have an essential supply of clothes and very few personal items. I have nothing to worry about. I easily get over shopping, new phone model exits, and sales. Life has shown me - I don't need any of that and am easily satisfied with what I have. This saves a lot of resources and saves a lot of worries: none of it is not afraid to lose at any time and is easily replaced by something appropriate.
9. I know and accept myself - and if something is good for me, I will take care of it myself.
10. I love to dream, but I haven't planned anything for a long time.
11. In every situation I only look on the bright side. Not because I don't see everything else - I deliberately push the negative away from me. I have never felt better because of looking at the minuses, but concentrating on the pleasant, even microscopic nuances makes life blossom, like a bud.
12. I am truly grateful for everything that happens. I am childishly delighted and pleased by any little thing - gang cats on the sidewalk, the bare trunks of sycamore trees, the eyebrows of a schnauzer, the smile of a salesman, simple drying in a Hungarian village store. I take nothing for granted and live for one day. Today I breathe, I am not in pain, I have something to feed myself, I have something to wear and a place to bow my head, I have soulful friends around me and a job I love. That is more than enough. It's an easy burden to walk with.
