How to speak to be heard?
One person can speak publicly just pronouncing particular words. But a good speaker tells not just to be listened but to be heard. Everyone should possess a skill to speak clearly and persuasively: a young man that comes to a job interview for the first time, a mum who has to explain to her child basic rules of behavior in the society, a scientist that made a discovery and seeks to tell his colleagues about it. As you see, making yourself heard is a necessity. Any entrepreneur will confirm that without the skill of persuasive public speaking you cannot achieve success in any business.
Unfortunately, at school we learn only how to read and write, but none of us is taught how to listen and to express thoughts efficiently. That is why many adults face an issue of not being able to speak in public. In a modern world with its crazy pace of life many would prefer to communicate virtually in messengers losing a habit of communication in real life. And when we must contact someone personally such people feel discomfort. They cannot express themselves so the others would hear them and not just their nod their heads as a sing of politeness.
Experts on communication studies attach great importance to the people`s ability to influence others by using the instrument everyone possesses – their voice. But not everyone can use it properly and effectively. On the one hand, we find ourselves among sounds. But nevertheless, we cannot properly benefit from the voice that was given by nature so we could convey some sense.
Julian Treasure and his findings
Jiulian Treasure is one of the key experts on public speaking techniques. He dedicated numerous books and lectures to this issue. Treasure claims that there are at least three reasons why the audience does not listen to the speaker.
1. Negativity. Some people see every aspect of life in a negative way, and they try to spread this feeling among others. Such people are hard to communicate with. One can hear speakers like this only with a very big effort.
2. Excuses. People that are difficult to communicate can be those who are constantly accusing everyone – their parents, neighbors, the government and so on. If their behavior is also characterized as ordinary nagging, complaining about life it is not surprising that others do not listen even ignore such any kind of interaction with them.
3. Embroidery. When a person tries to embellish reality, he or she is very likely to say a lie. And lying is by no means attractive for the auditory.
But there are a few traits that draw attention to the speaker. They are sincerity, honesty, and desire to be yourself. According to Trager, what people are most influenced by is the voice. And this is of utmost importance when you must convey something really relevant.
The researchers demonstrate that the perception of certain speeches depends on the parameters of the speaker`s voice, such as:
1. Most people prefer deep, warm, and soft voices. Such sounds are pleasant to listen to. While harsh voices are very likely to entail negative emotions.
2. Speech’s pace. If one speaks too excitedly, quickly, the auditory will perceive the tension. This can engender anxiety and will obstacle normal information perception. On the contrary, if the speaker talks slowly, he or she can improve the speech by making it calmer and more understandable. The pauses will help to place emphasis appropriately.
3. Timbre. Scholars noticed long ago that people are more prone to put their trust into those who have a low voice, that is why they are attracted by people with such a voice. If one wants to express confidence, authority he or she speaks in a lower voice.
4. Volume. By making music sound more or less loud we not only convey a part of the information massaged but also express our own attitude.
In his book “TED talks: speaking, listening, hearing” Treasure gives his own advice regarding how to speak brightly, persuasively so that others want to listen to you. The skill can be taught by making a row of relatively simple exercises and developing the voice`s paraments. As many experts think one should start fixing communication mistakes by fixing his own mistakes.
Voice is the instrument of emotions
In order to make the audience want to listen to your speech you should have certain tools in your arsenal. Before speaking it is better to verify if you have all the necessary stuff and define your strong and weak points. The speaker will be heard if his voice expresses emotions, feelings, internal energy. Besides, the speech must reflect what people think and have a positive influence on them.
By controlling your energy, your voice soundings and by using the right timbre, volume, and pace you can avoid monotony in your speech. Your emotions will help you to convey the necessary sense. Moreover, a person is known to be given information not only verbally but also reads universal signs such as gestures, facial moves, manner of speaking and so on and so forth. Thus, helps listeners to understand better what you are saying.
In order to convey exactly what you want use your voice – know the breathing techniques and know how to place emphasis. Improve your voice`s characteristics, enlarge your vocabulary and try to have a new experience in communications with the audience. You can learn everything if you control how your voice sounds through the day and what emotions it expresses. The key aspect is to have a desire and be ready to practice.
Why is it important to have a proper voice?
I do often come across people who ask me to teach them how to speak so they are heard. The skill they need for their professional and everyday activity. During personal or business talks it is essential to be able to convey the right sense.
In order to be heard it is of utmost importance to be able to benefit from all capacities your voice possesses. You should know how to play with the voice and control how you sound. You can achieve that by defining what exactly you want to make people know, what emotions you want to express and what feedback you intend to produce. Such a preparation, and it is not important whether you speak in front of your colleagues or only one person, puts you into special conditions which will be conveyed through the voice and the audience will listen to you actively.
TOP-5 Ways to Increase Income Over Communication
Trust is essential not only in communication between people, but in business as well. Want to boost sales, increase customer loyalty and just make friends? This requires some trust building measures. Scientists working in the field of cognitive psychology and behavioral factors have conducted a number of studies related to the phenomenon of trust, both in the context of business and interaction between people. The results of the study made it possible to grasp several criteria on which trust is based. Following these simple yet efficient steps you will not just gain more income, but learn how to get 200% out of communication with people.
Positive and negative preconceptions
A person was recommended to the HR specialist and described as an excellent specialist. Even if it turns out during the interview that the candidate’s skills and competencies do not correspond to those stated in the vacancy or he/she did not meet the HR’s personal expectations, he/she will still find arguments in the candidate’s defense, precisely because he/she was recommended earlier. On the contrary, if HR first hears negative reviews, then he/she will be biased to the potential worker, even if he/she is a perfect match according to the results of the interview.
Compliments win people over, that's a fact. But giving compliments is also an art of the kind, since excessive flattery immediately reveals self-interest. The best option is to make compliments as if they are coming from the 3rd person. For example, one can tell a coworker that a high-profile acquaintance of his spoke flatteringly about that colleague. This will endear the person as far self-esteem has been arisen in him.
Frequency and regularity
What happens when people meet each other over and over again? They begin to get used to it, recognize each other when they meet, smile, have some small talks. It is important to remember that people provide and express a lot of information using non-verbal means of communication, the body language, gestures and facial expressions. So the interlocutor subconsciously interprets these signals. If one doesn't want to make contact and reject the person deep inside, he will be unlikely willing to communicate either. But if he is sincerely glad to meet people around, then they will treat him the same way.
Duration of communication
The length of the relationship also affects the degree of trust. The longer we know someone, the higher the level of trust becomes.
The rapprochement between people occurs gradually, in the process of joint leisure. So the more colleagues or just friends communicate on various topics, the closer they become. While interacting closely and with pleasure, human brain begins to subconsciously perceive the companion as someone close and the level of trust grows.
All interpersonal relationships are built according to the formula:
Trust = disposition + regularity + duration + intensity
The fact that this formula works is perfectly illustrated by the following case. One of my clients set himself the goal of increasing sales and attracting more customers. He planned to use networking and various events for these purposes, which were attended by his potential clients, as well as people who make important decisions in large companies. The niche was narrow enough and everyone already knew each other. Naturally, nobody wanted to expand the circle of contacts. My client acted wisely. He found out where and when the events were held and began to appear there, without showing any vivid interest. Thoughtful self-presentation and some small talk helped him to start communication, winning over the people he was talking to. Also he appeared wherever his clients were flocking more and more often. In a while their meetings and interactions became more intense and lasted longer. He started talking about his business and new solutions. As a result, he entered into multimillion-dollar contracts, found clients and increased sales by 60%!
This case shows that trust is not only the key to increasing sales, but also to building productive communication. In an era of technological progress, pandemic and forced isolation, people miss communication and interesting contacts. Remember to use the trust formula to achieve your goals.
Criticism: Let’s React Properly
When we talk about fear of public speaking, it is important to understand that it’s not a fear of speaking in front of an audience on its own but a fear of criticism. The very same “What will people say”, “What if they don’t like it” and a hundred more similar ideas and thoughts, appearing in our mind. When I ask clients what they think they lack, almost a half of them say that they are afraid of criticism.
The bad news is that criticism is essential if you want to improve your skills or learn something new. There is one important point to be mentioned – how criticism is expressed. Sometimes people try to do the deed perfectly, in hope that they won’t be criticized. This is a typical trap of consciousness, because the better you do something, the more criticism you hear. Sad but true.
I have a lot of stories in my piggy bank, and one of them happened to me personally. A couple of years ago I was performing with artists from La Scala. To make it clear, it is the highest level for singers. Despite the fact that I tried my best at the rehearsals, criticism literally poured out on me. In the end I could not stand it anymore and asked why they criticized me so much. The answer was a true shock back then - "Because you are the only one who can handle the part." Since then, I have learned to be more relaxed about criticism, dividing it into constructive and destructive.
We grow and learn to perceive criticism as an attempt to push our boundaries. The most important thing here is to clearly understand who is criticizing you and not to take everything personally. There are people who criticize only what they personally do not like or what they lack themselves. And you, your personality, have absolutely nothing to do with it. Another thing is when you ask a professional for advice. In this case, you need to heed.
If you want to get maximum profit from criticism, it is better to perceive it from the position of a student, namely, to highlight what a person lacks and try to understand his vision of the case. Excuses, attempts to prove the opposite are absolutely useless here. This dialogue is doomed to become a bitter skirmish. The point is that your opponent is also afraid of criticism and is not ready to accept it.
David Barnes, in his book “Mood Therapy: How to Respond to Criticism”, discusses the deep roots of criticism and how to respond to it. The author even described a clear plan that is designed to disarm the opponent.
1. Benefit above all. Criticism has two mutually exclusive goals - to help or to destroy. Try to ask the critic some questions in a calm and emotionless voice to determine which of the goals he really pursues. If you feel that he simply pours buckets of criticism on you, try to find out what exactly your opponent does not like and what he would advise you to improve the situation. It is very important to control not only what you say, but also how you do it.
2. Agree. And do as you see it. This point may seem absurd. Indeed, it is difficult to agree with a person who unfairly criticizes you or finds fault wherever possible. But your opponent is just waiting for you to start arguing and making excuses. When instead you agree and listen politely to his opinion, further attacks tend to stop. Done, the opponent remains unarmed, because you immediately showed that you are not going to fight with him, which means that there is simply no point in fighting.
3. Arguments are the best policy. Compromise is the best solution. Try to build a dialogue so that the person is forced to agree with you. A calm and confident tone is a must for success. In the case of argumentation, proceed as follows. First, make the weak argument, then the strongest, and then just an average one. According to statistics, people usually pay more attention to the second argument in a raw, although remember the last one.
Another unobvious, but important point. Always have support. These are all those people whose opinion you listen to and whom you trust, those who will try to help and not just increase their self-esteem at your expense. In addition, the very feeling that there are people behind you who appreciate what you do helps to be more confident.
The main thing to remember is a simple pattern: critics and haters of all sorts come in if you do something special. It is easy to let them control your life and mood, undermining your self-confidence. But it is much better to learn how to properly respond to such streams of criticism. Ultimately, the better you do something, the more criticism you get.
6 useful skills for business presentation
Self-presentation is an important skill that helps us to present our business and our brand, to express our thoughts and to attract our auditory in social media. Many entrepreneurs use video content for effective communication and the creation of emotional bounds. In this case they can use numerous events, such as:
• Every possible forum
• Conferences with different topics
• International meetings
It’s very important for successful presentations to develop soft skills in communication and to interact with a partner or a client. That’s why a lot of people are interested in presentation skills training as a useful tool for the popularization of their brand, products and services.
Not everyone is an extravert who can perform effortlessly. The most people need to break a mental barrier for effective communication. It’s important to master these soft skills for a business presentation. These skills are good not only for the career, but also for our personal life.
The presentation training Voice&Leadership includes useful tips for business presentations. Here are six basic soft skills for an effective performance:
1. The tone of voice. The timbre and the intonation can reveal many things about a speaker. Scientists from Business Speech Science Research conducted the study about the influence of voice on people’s emotions and on the improvements of your business. The results showed that a low tone of voice is subconsciously perceived as a voice of a leader, a person with a high social status. A high tone indicates our anxiety and the lack of confidence.
2. The space. An experience performer is filling the auditory with their personality. The body language shows the confidence. Firm postures, a straight glance, movements indicate the power. A good speaker knows how to use the space the best.
3. Gesticulation. A performer knows how to use the hands. The appropriate gestures help to look natural and vibrant; besides, it helps auditory to memorize all information.
4. A calm tone of voice, clear diction, and appropriate pauses underline the ability to avoid the stress. The vocal training implies the work on the speech, the creation of the scheme of the performance.
5. A good speaker is able to express thoughts using a simple and understandable language. A well-structured performance improves the perception of the topic, causes the interest and emphasizes the important moments. Lengthy explanations and blurred terms weaken the attention of our auditory
6. A smile. A lively facial expression shows our uniqueness. It helps to make a good interaction with people and to create comfortable atmosphere. It’s enough to look at different media people to understand the effectiveness of a friendly smile.
Thus, the ability of self-presentation is a useful soft skill for a performer. It helps to create a personal brand that will be effective when you are selling products and services.
How to present yourself effectively
Self-presentation is the ability to present oneself effectively and advantageously in various situations: an individual style of communication, a unique image that not only likes oneself but also is attractive to others. Most people, consciously or unconsciously, seek to influence the process of forming an impression of themselves.
Public men know a lot about self-presentation. The skills developed over the years purposefully emphasize the individual qualities and values of TV and Instagram presenters.
So, who is the public person? The answer is simple - a man who knows how to change, navigate, react quickly, use effective communication but above all skillfully present himself. Using the example of famous politicians, showmen, presenters, you will see what qualities will help you to confidently present yourself, media communication, achieve goals, and improve your communication skills.
1. Ability to listen
Oprah Winfrey is a famous US presenter and actor. In 1986, she created her show - The Oprah Winfrey Show, which brought her not only fame and fortune but also made her the most powerful woman in the United States. Oprah easily shared her own experience, listened to others, was sensitive to the interlocutors, and cried so that the whole of America cried with her. The TV presenter owns a print publication, her film studio, a radio network, and a cable TV channel. She is the only black female billionaire in history.
The ability to listen and express particular and active interest in another person helps to win him over. If you want to find new clients, demonstrate your interest not only verbally but also non-verbally. You will learn many new things for yourself and win over the other person to you with the help of soft skills training.
2. Body Mirroring
The next time you are attending a formal reception or party, notice that some of the people communicating with each other sit or stand in the same position and repeat each other's gestures. This “mirroring” is a means by which one person tells another that he agrees with his opinion and views.
The young chancellor of Austria knows how to listen carefully but also he owns body mirroring. Sebastian Kurz's lightning-fast career does not surprise anyone. He knew where he wanted to be from an early age and was already the chairman of The Austrian People's Party at the age of 21. At 27, Kurz became a minister of foreign affairs. There was no time to study but a career absorbed all resources. Therefore, at 31, Sebastian Kurz became the youngest chancellor in Europe.
Despite his young age, Kurz recognized that to make a career among far from young conservatives he needs to behave like party members. He masterfully mirrors the non-verbal communication of his colleagues with phenomenal accuracy.
If you look closely and observe him during public speaking, it is noticeable that there are few marks of “youth.” All his movements and those few gestures, he makes slowly. He tries to convey an “adult” message and makes it perfect but he is only 33 years old. These soft skills helped him achieve a lot.
Prominent politician Winston Churchill is credited with saying that the most significant talent is positive oratory. The British politician, like some orators of antiquity, suffered from a speech impediment. He spent a lot of time focusing on vocal training. And the lisp did not stop him from becoming a heart-moving statesman. Churchill was not afraid to show emotions in his speech, he used short and simple words, which brought himself closer to the people. He understood the power of humor and skillfully used it in his speeches creating a good mood for those around him.
4. Combine incongruous
The percentage of successful women in the world is not great but stable. The young guard, like the fighters against ageism, is conquering the media space. Being a strong personality and broadcasting femininity is not always easy but possible. This can be seen in the example of Anna Wintour.
The Vogue editor has always been the most influential person in the US fashion industry. However, the name of Anna Wintour has become a global brand, and not only in the field of fashion. This was because of her business presentation. Anna Wintour's powerful friends constitute a kind of coalition of goodwill, expanding her reach far beyond the editorial staff of Vogue, which she has led since 1988. Wintour's network of contacts extends to Hollywood and Washington, captures many other cities and countries. The Guardian newspaper called her “the unofficial mayor of New York.”
5. Fill the space
Emmanuel Macron was a diligent acting student with his wife, Brigitte. He masterfully owns the skills of non-verbal communication. Deftly varies in any situation: somewhere he is sweet and smiling and somewhere he firmly defends his position.
Despite his short stature, he can fill the space, both in small halls and at large venues. The ability to control energy and gesticulate appropriately characterizes him as a purposeful, strong-willed person who knows where to go.
According to a study held by Migrabyan, we perceive people by 93% through non-verbal communication and only 7% by words. Therefore, it is never too late to direct non-verbal signals in the right direction.
3 factors of the perfect voice for public speaking
3 factors of the perfect voice for public speaking
It’s worth thinking about the influence of your voice on communication with other people. Maybe you have attended events after that you were inspired and ready to achieve new goals? How the voice can affect the abilities of persuading and what factors are important for the improvement of your voice?
The voice is one of the most powerful instruments to influence other people. Our communication depends on the following voice tr
Using the voice you can have the influence on a person, their mood and emotions. You can urge a person to do something or relax and calm them. Many people don’t even think about the voice training. How to improve the timbre and to make the speech more expressive? This questions come to the mind only during public speaking when you notice weakness and shiver of the voice.
The main cause of the troubles with our voice is a physical suppression, for example, the tension in the jaw, spasms in the neck and shoulders muscles, poor posture.
The diaphragmatic breathing
The first indicator of stress is accelerated breathing. The voice gets high and thin. These are indicators of the excitement. The training of diaphragmatic breathing will help to avoid the anxiety and will allow keeping the voice under control.
What is diaphragmatic breathing? It is the way of breathing when the diaphragm plays an active role enriching the blood with oxygen without participation of the shoulders and the chest. In a word, it is breathing with the help of the lower abdomen or belly breathing. People who do yoga, meditation and other breathing practices are aware of importance of such breathing.
During the training process you should pay attention to the shoulders and the rib cage: they should be immovable, the jaw should be relaxed. Using the diaphragm you can improve not only your breathing, but also your diction.
The voice training implies the regulation of breathing by the diaphragm. You should remember that the diaphragm is the main respiratory muscle. It’s founded on the lungs and has a form of the moon.
The modern world makes people keep a sedentary lifestyle. It leads to the posture dysfunction and the curvature of the spine. As a result, the diaphragm’s muscles constrict that provokes wrong breathing and slurred speech.
Diaphragmatic breathing plays a crucial role in the voice training. When a person breathes in a right way, the voice sounds louder and richer. It affects a listener the way they involve in the process and memorize the information better.
A tense jaw as an important indicator of stress
People are inclined to hold their emotions and thoughts pressing the jaw. It doesn’t allow opening the mouth during communication. The sound waves are reducing, the voice sounds quietly and the speech is slurred. To make your voice be confident you should relax the jaw muscles, and the mouth should be opened widely enough. Remember that the tension in the jaw can lead big problems. If you feel this discomfort, visit a doctor for examining and a treatment.
The research shows how persuasive our voice can be and how big influence it can have during communication with people. If you keep calm and balanced breathing, your jaw are relaxed, your voice will get louder, will become more persuasive with variable bright tones. The register will oscillate from low frequencies to high ones; your diction will improve and will become more emotional. A person with a pleasant and steady voice is considered as a leader. People listen to the leader, trust and follow this person with leadership traits. You must regularly work on your voice and it will definitely help you to achieve new goals and be successful!